“Let not our longing slay the appetite of our living.” - Jim Elliot
Not a day goes by when I am wondering where exactly God is leading me during this time of waiting. I had so many dreams for the future when I graduated from college. I was going to land an awesome job, work my way up the ladder, and be extremely successful in business. Instead, I sit here loathing the two part-time jobs I do have, knowing full well neither one of them is going to take me anywhere exciting.
One of my current reads happens to be Elizabeth George’s "Loving God with All Your Mind". I am only part-way through the book, but I keep going back to this one chapter - the one challenging me to think on what is true about my future. The world spits lies at us about our beauty, our self-worth, and about God’s plan (or perceived lack of) for our lives. I am at the front of the line when it comes to believing them. The brain is an extremely powerful organ, aiding and abetting my destruction if I give it permission.
- What if I am stuck working in an industry that is uninteresting and unfulfilling?
- What if I went to college for nothing?
- What if my life is completely defined by unsuccessfulness?
- What if I never make a difference?
What if......what if..........what if?
The truth is - God has a plan far greater than my mind can imagine or dream of.
The truth is – God knows what He is doing when He says no to some jobs and wait for other opportunities.
The truth is – Psalm 139:16.
“All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.”
I do not want my longing for something that is either temporarily or permanently out of reach to define how I live my life right now. Yes, my life often feels like a 1,000 little puzzle pieces scattered about the table – some are put together while many of them lie alone. I do not even have the image on the box to help me. But my God knows the whole picture.
And that’s good enough for me.