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Monday, June 14, 2010

Completing Him Challenge: Dating Days.....

I first met Joseph when his dad decided to become the new pastor of our church. I was about 12 yrs old and Joseph was around 16 years old. But age didn't matter to me - the moment I saw him, I got that little school girl crush that never went away. I was a girl desperately trying to prove my womanhood to this wonderful guy who seemed more and more like a fantasy. You know the drill......reading into everything he said to me with a hopeful feeling! We ran in the same circles, and hung out with the same friends, but I was still a little sister to him and I wanted to be more.

According to Joseph, he began to recognize me as "relationship" material in the Spring of my Junior year. He remembers watching me playing a high school volleyball game and thinking, "Maybe I should get to know this girl better...."  But he did not want to make his intentions known yet. We spent the summer apart - Me working at Camp BaYouCa and him working at Camp Lamoka. It was a wonderful growing time for both of us and we communicated throughout the summer with letters. Finally, in August 2004, right before my senior year, he said he liked me and wanted to start a relationship to see if it would develop into something more.

This was our very first picture of the two of us......

We were attending a CCA soccer game - something we did often that Fall. It was a great way to get to know one another!

I knew Joseph was really serious about me when he attended our High School Jr/Sr with me. He had this thing about not going because it was a social situation that made people feel bad when they did not have a date. But he relented. :)

That summer, I switched over to work at Camp Lamoka with Joseph. Talk about trials and tribulations! When you work alongside in ministry, there is no hiding any flaws! We both came out of that summer stretched and stronger in our relationship.

(Joseph and I are on the left side - he is in a blue shirt and I am in a pink.)

If you asked our friends and family what was one of the greatest things about our relationship, it would be our communication. We talked about everything. And we were so good at letting the other person know how we were feeling or what we thought about this or that. We were the epitome of best friends! When I look at our marriage today, I see how we have become lax in our communication. By not communicating, we "assume" that is what the other person meant by what he or she said and it often leads to hurt feelings because we don't talk it out. I would love to get back to the place where we just spend time talking and getting to know one another's hearts and not turning a conversation into a fight, simply because we were not communicating our feelings clearly.

This week, and throughout this summer challenge, I purpose to become more of a communicator with my husband!


Bethany said...

Great post Kalyn! What a great reminder for all of us. Communication seems so easy when you are first dating and it really does become harder and harder. Continue to seek out that time with your love. I am sure it will be well worth it!!

Joseph said...

Wow... The post was awesome! Took me back. Still trying to figure out how you still loved me with that hair style (soccer game pic). :-)

You on the other hand have somehow always been beautiful!

Andrew said...

Yeah Joe, you definitely had a Conan O'Brien thing going on there.

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